did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
