Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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