I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
