Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
