I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
