So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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