someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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