4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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