matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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