Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
