Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize