awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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