i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
