barbara walters just said penis...
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
