i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
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