Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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