apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
