when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
You pole danced in your parka.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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