M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
