Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
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You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
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If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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