NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
