I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
