I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
