no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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