We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?