Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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