How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Randomize