Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
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She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
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is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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