Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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