well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
sick fucks of a feather flock together
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Randomize
