Say something about gay babies.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize