Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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