I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
