you guys were way drunker than both of me
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
