when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
