i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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