He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
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