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do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
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