you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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