Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
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