just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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