You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
