If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
