I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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