Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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