i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
