Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
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We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
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You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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