My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Come back. Shots need mouths.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
