Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize
