In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize